Not Your Keys Keyring | Oak | XL 200x80mm | Funny Gift

A 200×80mm oak keyring laser-engraved with “Not Your Keys” — a deadpan label for anyone who keeps picking up the wrong set from a shared key hook. Made from FSC-certified 4mm oak veneered MDF with a metal split ring, in our workshop in North Wales. The standard wording ships as shown; a short extra line (a name or a house name) can be added underneath.

It works as a Secret Santa, a stocking filler or a small birthday present for a forgetful housemate, and it does the practical job too — at this size the keys are hard to mistake for anyone else’s.

Plastic-free — a wooden keyring and a metal split ring, no plastic parts.

How to order

1. Add to basket — “Not Your Keys” is engraved as standard
2. Optional: add a name or short extra line in the personalisation box
3. Bulk discounts apply automatically from 20 of the same product

Specifications

• Material: FSC-certified 4mm oak veneered MDF
• Size: 200mm × 80mm (XL)
• Engraving: “Not Your Keys” — standard wording
• Personalisation: Optional extra line in the personalisation box
• Fitting: Metal split ring included

For indoor use only. All items are made to order. Dispatch time is shown at checkout. UK orders via Royal Mail Tracked 24. International via Royal Mail International Tracked.

Frequently asked questions

Can I change the wording completely?
The standard line stays; a short extra line can be added. For wording entirely of your own, see the personalised XL keyring.

Is there a bamboo version?
Yes — the Not Your Keys bamboo keyring is the same size in FSC-certified Moso bamboo (certificate RINA-COC-001256).

Which wordings do you make in the XL 200×80mm size?
The same 200×80mm blank is engraved with a range of fixed messages: Don’t Lose This Key (also in 3mm bamboo and 5mm bamboo), Where’s My Keys, Not Your Keys (bamboo), Do Not Remove (bamboo), Master Key – Do Not Remove From Office (bamboo), Master Key – Do Not Remove From Home (bamboo), Master Key (bamboo), Spare Key, Toilet Key (bamboo), Bathroom (bamboo), Accessible Bathroom (bamboo), Don’t Forget Me (bamboo), Please Return This Key (bamboo), and a fully personalised XL keyring in oak or bamboo for any wording of your own.

Oak or bamboo — what is the difference?
Both are 200×80mm with a metal split ring. The oak version is FSC-certified 4mm oak veneered MDF, with a warm, even grain. The bamboo version is FSC-certified Moso bamboo (certificate RINA-COC-001256), 3mm thick, slightly more moisture-resistant and a little lighter in colour; a 5mm bamboo option is thicker and heavier again. Neither is printed — the lettering is laser-engraved into the surface, so it cannot peel or fade.

Can I order these in quantity for an office, club or holiday let?
Yes. Bulk discounts apply automatically at checkout from 20 of the same product — 10% at 20, 15% at 50, 20% at 100, 25% at 250, 30% at 500 and 35% at 1,000. If each keyring needs different wording, list it in the personalisation box, one line per keyring.

Also see: all wooden keyrings, holiday accommodation signs and keyrings and hotel and hospitality supplies.